Do Less, Be More

Amy Morrison • August 22, 2026

To Be or Not To Be, that is the question.

What does it mean to “be a parent”?

For many parents, very little conscious and deliberate thought is put into the meaning of this work (because it IS work, not just a job).

Commercials have sold us on images of what parenting looks like—coaching the kids soccer team or driving a van full of kiddos for carpool, but what does YOUR parenting look like?

Think about your day. Imagine you have a camera recording your family’s daily life.

How much of the day is spent with your child(ren)?

How much of that time is spent one-on-one vs alongside them as an accessory?

How much of the day is spent planning activities, coordinating events, scheduling appointments for your child(ren)?

I call these things “doing parenting”. Stuff we do with, or for, our kid(s) that are one part of the parenting equation, and often the part others see. When we overdo “doing parenting” we find ourselves a little disconnected because we’re often stuck in a loop of checking off boxes, getting from thing to another, and working on a timeline.

Now let’s go back to the question and remove the physical “doing” work as we ponder again what it means to be a parent.

Does it mean:

· being a role model?

· being a disciplinarian or someone who helps them learn about outcomes and consequences?

· being a protector?

· being a cheerleader and source of encouragement?

· being a listener?

You could likely add many more titles and adjectives, but I presume you get the gist of the exercise.

When you shift to “do less” maybe you can “be more”.

Doing less might feel uncomfortable for a while; that’s likely just fear bubbling up inside you. Fear of judgement (“What will the other families think if we stop going to gymnastics?”), fear of the unknown (“Won’t my child be bored if they don’t have an after-school activity every day/What will they do all day?”), and fear of rejection (“If I say no, my kid will become a social leper.”) are common parenting fears that cause us to stay in the doing loop.

The doing loop is short term success. When we spend too much time and energy parenting from this place it doesn’t feel good because there’s no real connection. And humans need connection, especially young humans.

When we shift our parenting to the “being” state of mind, we might find ourselves:

· playing with or alongside our child(ren)

· letting them be the car dj and singing along to every song they choose

· listening without interrupting

· asking them what would feel good, rather than making the decision without consulting them first

· having a movie night in (no phones allowed)

Love is felt through moments of connection. So as you build your back-to-school schedules, be sure to make time for being with your kiddo(s). Your presence teaches them more valuable skills than your pocketbook ever could.

With peace & love,

Amy

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A Poem for Parents

By Amy Morrison • September 17, 2026

Sometimes you’ll be sitting on a gift that doesn’t make sense for you right at that moment, instead its value will show up many years later. That’s parenthood, actually, in a nutshell, isn’t it? We start off in complete wonder…confused as to what to do with this little being placed in our arms, our lives. We then spend years sharing our time, energy, finances, and body with a small tyrant (who, on better days, feels like a generous little narcissist). We invest all our resources in them and find ourselves collecting crayon-colored placemats as payments. Time slips by... the wobbly-lined drawings diminish, and suddenly we realize: these babies are on loan to us . {Ooof. Is that not a gut-punch?} Back to the poetry part. Nearly twenty years ago, my beautiful mama gave me a copy of one of Mary Ann Radmacher’s poems. If you don’t know Mary Anne’s work, she’s an artist and a writer. Her poems are as visual as they are lyrical. And honestly, when I read this poem initially, I thought it was sweet, but didn’t really connect with its message yet. I tucked it away in a pile of cards and papers, and found it again many years later when I was going through some bins. This time when I read it, I was knee deep into parenting. I was on the cusp of knowing that this (cue the wild gesturing) was all temporary. I likely had had a day that felt like it was seven hours too long, but the words on the page awakened me. They registered in my heart. I felt like Mary Anne Radmacher must be the most enlightened being to be able to summarize so many important parenting precepts in such a loving, honest, and moving manner. Since then, this poem, rescued from the bin of embarrassing photos and yellowing cards from people I no longer know, has been framed and on display in our home(s) for anyone else to read. I’ve included the poem below, but seeing the words in times new roman (excuse me, muli, to be most accurate) font just doesn’t have the same impact as Mary Anne’s scripty style. This is one of her older poems, so it’s very difficult to come by (I’ve tried), but the words are still worth hearing. Note: I’ve type it in the way it appears on my copy, knowing that the phrase breaks may or may not be intentional with the artwork that was also on the poem. I can’t wait to hear what you think of it and if you’d add anything. Maybe reading this will inspire you to make your own reminders. Peace and Love, ~A reminders for parents your child will survive because of you and succeed in spite of you. there is nothing you can do to prepare for three things: age three, age thirteen, and when your child leaves home. you are not prejudiced— your child is the most amazing! it is a genetic unlikelihood that bad behavior comes from a single side of the family. your child will appreciate embarrassing photos and stories a) after they are forty, b) after they have a child of their own. it washes out. It can be repaired. the most precious thing is your child. it behavior is embarrassing…it has to do with your ego…not theirs. remember the difference between looking and seeing. thoughts of your child will bring tears at unexpected moments. ~ mary anne radmacher